This weeks WordPress Weekly Photo Challenge subject is Dreamy. Watching the sunset over Lake Taupo with the snow-covered mountains in the background was rather magical.
Month: October 2014
Perfect Job
From your musical tastes to your political views, were you ever way ahead of the rest of us, adopting the new and the emerging before everyone else?
My sixth form English teacher wrote on my reference to leave high school—I have a unique personality. I was so proud. He did understand me. And with that reference, I got my first job—as a trainee psychiatric nurse. It was perfect for me. I had two requirements for my job. I wanted to work with people and I didn’t want to be a general nurse. Both requirements ticked. It was 1981 and most of Australia, possibly the world were not thinking about mental health issues or work, even their own. I was then and I am today, still proud to be helping people find their way through difficult times.
Today, the stigma of having mental health problems or working in mental health is broken. People realise through advertising that mental health problems can and do happen to anyone and everyone.There is more information around on how, when and where to get help. Bosses are encouraged to talk to their staff about any concerns they have and encourage people to seek help.
Universities teach more mental health content and encourage people through mental health placements to take up this worthwhile career option. Today, working in mental health, you can specialise in many areas, developing many transferable skills. For most of the last two decades, I have chosen to specialise in eating disorders, however my acute psychiatry skills are never far away.
If I had my time again, would I change anything? No. My experiences and career choices have made me who I am today. If you or someone you know is considering a career in any area of mental health, I would encourage them to give it a try. It is very rewarding helping people find themselves again after difficult times.
Choices
Everyday we make choices.This classic Dr Suess quote reminds us that we can achieve our goals by carrying through with our choices. It is as simple as:
1. Make a decision about what you want to do and how you want to do it.
2. Use your feet to follow through with your body, in whatever way is needed to act on your choice.
3. Remember—its your choice. Steer yourself as needed and you can change your choice, any time you choose.
Who said life has to be complicated. Sometimes, it is important to remember to break things down to their simplest level.
My Creation
All of my adult life I have had a creative side. Not arty, but creative. Initially it was my knitting. I can knit in the dark and even as a 9 year old my tension was so perfect the teacher didn’t believe that I had completed my project. She thought mum had done it for me—no chance ever.
During my training as a psychiatric nurse in the 80’s picture knitting was in fashion. So you would find me at the back of the room taking notes and knitting with 20 little balls of wool running down the aisle—to match the number of colour changes I had in my self-designed picture. Occasionally a teacher who didn’t like our class would not let me knit and you would find me asleep. Being creative and productive with my hands helped me concentrate. Something I only recently found out is actually based on fact.
Photo Credit: Google Images Example of 1980’s picture knitting
In my 30’s I learnt to cross-stitch and I enjoyed creating my own designs. The creation factor was similar to picture knitting except that you could do more intricate work. I designed and made many children’s name plaques for their doors when they were born. It puts a smile on my face today, when I would go into their homes in their teenage years and still see them in their rooms albeit now they are in a corner.
My creativity has changed hands again. Today my main creative outlet is my writing. It began in 2009 when I set my goal for that year as becoming a writer. As a result my most prized possession was born. My book. It has been 5 years in the making, although during this time I took twelve months off due to life circumstances. This turned out to be a good thing for my book, as my writing style changed and suddenly everything fell together.
It is now 12 months since I completed my first draft. My next step was to test it out. I had to give it to others to read. I had mixed feelings about this. What if they didn’t like it? Who am I anyway? I knew everyone was exited about my book and thought that I was the perfect person to write a book on how eating disorder recovery is possible as I had been working in the area for over 20 years. The answer was that I had to back myself—believe in my self. I knew my book was good, practical and factual. I needed to put it out there and see what happened. So with pride I handed it the first person. And the next. And the next. That wasn’t so bad. I even had people coming to me to be reviewers, as they wanted to know what I had to say. Now I was excited, when I saw how excited everyone else was. The feedback form my patients was the most important to me. I wanted to make sure I didn’t come across as confusing or offensive in any way. The good news was that they loved it and thought it was the most comprehensive book on eating disorder recovery that they had read. Yes—I had achieved my goal.
Getting the core right was one thing. Now I needed to ensure the minor detail—editing, order-flow were the best that they could be and that I had left nothing out. To some of my patients surprise, I did find 3 more topics to add. Now the next challenge. Getting it published. This has been a step learning curve. I sent out a chapter early to Allen and Unwin’s The Friday Pitch and heard nothing back. Initially, I felt rejected but in hindsight I understand why and it helped me take my book to the next level. At present, I am preparing my final pitches to get my book traditionally published. I now know a lot more about it, than when I first pitched to Allen and Unwin and if I have no success I realise it is the process, not a validation of my book. My plan B is to self publish next year. Either way my prized possession will transform itself from its current chunky manuscript form into a beautiful, lighter book form that can help people everywhere.
Mindful Exercise
Good news — another hour has just been added to every 24-hour day (don’t ask us how. We have powers). How do you use those extra sixty minutes?
I fit most things I want to do into my 24 hour day. Being given the gift of an extra hour would allow me to have no more excuses for the two activities I run out of time to do—exercise and meditation.
While I walk daily as part of my commute to work, any other exercise program is very hit and miss. I would love to flex my muscles weekly in other ways. Options I would like to investigate include:
- Aqua aerobics
- Cycling in the open air
- Resistance training
- Swimming
- Yoga
- Zumba class
The other area I believe I would benefit greatly from is developing a daily meditation practice. I like walking meditation. My preference is to walk bare foot on grass or sand—connecting with nature. My reasons for this are:
- Grounding me with the earth and its energy
- Stimulate the reflexology points in my feet
- Massage my feet improving circulation
- Connecting with nature reduces my stress and quickly clears my mind
- I love the feeling of sand or grass on under my feet—its a different healing sensation
Walking on the beach as a birthday treat
I believe a nice mixture of both of these activities will be a great way to spend my extra hour. They would be so beneficial to my health that I may need to reprioritise my current activities to include at least some of them each week. Both will give me more energy and creative awareness, which will be a blessing and worth the effort.
What do you need to reprioritise time for in your life? After all—this is the secret, I believe of getting an extra hour in our day. To make better use of the ones we currently have.
Making Changes
You wake up one morning and decide something in your life needs to change. You have been thinking about it for a while and suddenly you decide today is the day. How do you make the change?
Firstly, you need to know, what it is you need to change. Is it a big or small change? A small change may simply be a matter of substituting one thing for another e.g. having a glass of water instead of wine during the middle of the week. Other changes may have a bigger impact such as focusing on recovery and improving your mental health e.g. drug and alcohol rehabilitation or eating disorder recovery.
Whatever the reason you want to make the change, it is important to realise the benefits that you got from the behaviour / behaviours, you want to change. If it was a coping strategy, albeit an unhealthy one, you need to find a healthy option to substitute for it. There are no right and wrong answers here. Get support if necessary, do whatever you need to, to find alternative behaviours.
Break your change down to make it clear and easier to start. I like the What, When, Where, Why and How method. I find it makes planning simple and helps with accountability—I can easily see if I have completed the change. For example, using the initial change of wine into water, the plan is:
WHAT – Stop drinking wine mid week without a special occasion to celebrate
WHEN – Mondays through to Thursdays
WHERE – At home
WHY – It has become a habit and my body will function and sleep better without it
HOW – Drink sparkling mineral water instead using a splash of lemon or lime to make it special
If the areas you need to change are broad, break them down into smaller sections. Keep a list and prioritise which changes to make first. Focus on 1-2 areas at a time, as spreading your focus too thin means that you won’t change anything. It takes 3 weeks to change a habit, so practice each area for a month. This way you have the 3 weeks to change the habit and an extra week to maintain your behaviour change. Adding a few small changes together over a month—makes a significant difference to your life.
By constantly reviewing where you want to go and what is holding you back—you are able to keep your life moving forward in the direction you want it to go. Using these skills, when you get to a certain point and you find that life isn’t what you thought it would be—you can simply change direction by making a new plan.
Out Of My Comfort Zone
I don’t have any fears that paralyse me or cause me a large amount of anxiety that I cannot manage. However, networking is the activity that stresses me the most. It takes me out of my comfort zone. I have no problem talking to people—1:1, in small groups or even giving a speech to a large number of people. In fact, working with people is what I do for a living and I am confident at it.
When it comes to work social engagements, where networking comes into its own—this is where my confidence wanes. I am getting better however, as I realise that I am actually an introvert, not the extrovert I always thought I was. Being an introvert means that I recharge myself by quiet time not by mixing with others.
Becoming a published author hopefully next year, will require me to challenge this fear. As a result, I practice at every opportunity and I am definitely becoming more comfortable. The things I am doing to help improve my networking skills include:
- Joining Toastmasters where I practice social chit chat with a mixture of different people and cultures
- Designing my own one minute speech about myself, my book and my job
- I seek out people who I feel a connection with, rather than attempting to work the room
- Learn ways of remembering others names and details about them
- Find ways to give myself down time after the event and know when to leave
- Know the purpose of the event and set my own goals for attending
- Work with my strengths and personal values
- Be mindful of my surroundings and use my powers of observation to my advantage
- Be interested in others and ask appropriate questions
- Limit alcohol intake
- Keep up with current affairs to make conversation easier
While I may never be the social butterfly who can work a room and have people eating out of their hand—I can and will learn to network. It is important to be able to sell yourself. I have found becoming a part of the blogging community has helped to force me to reach out to others and gain the rewards of getting to know others with similar interests. By continuing to test my skills, who knows where this journey will take me. Do you have any other ideas on ways to improve one’s networking ability. I would love to hear them. After-all,
“If it is to be,
It is up to me.”
William H. Johnsen
One Lovely Blogger Award—2
This week I was nominated a second time for the One Lovely Blog Award by http://randomsbyarandom.wordpress.com/. I am thankful and I enjoy reading her blog as she is passionate about many things which this shows in her writing. Stop by its worth the visit. I have chosen to accept this award the second time, so I can pay it forward to other new bloggers.
The One Lovely Blog Award nominations are chosen by fellow bloggers for those newer or up-and-coming bloggers. The goal is to help give recognition and to also help the new blogger reach more viewers. It also recognizes blogs that are considered to be “lovely” by the fellow-blogger who chose them. This award acknowledges bloggers who share their story or thoughts in a beautiful manner to connect with their viewers and followers. In order to “accept” the award the nominated blogger must follow several guidelines.
The rules for accepting this award are:
1) Thank and link back to the person who nominated you for the award.
2) List the Rules and Display the One Lovely Blog Award logo to your post and/or blog.
3) Share 7 facts/or things about yourself.
4) Nominate around 15 other bloggers and let them know about the award
5) Follow the blogger who nominated you (if not already!)
Seven different facts about me:
1. I once set my tent on fire while camping.
2. I love cookies and cream ice-cream.
3. I am looking forward to going ice skating in Canada at the end of the year.
4. I have 2 sisters and a brother.
5. Elvis Presley died on my 15th birthday.
6. I don’t like either classical or heavy metal music.
7. Gone With the Wind is a favourite movie.
My nominations are:
http://rhodainmanila.wordpress.com/
http://myteacherthoughts.wordpress.com/
http://mydecadelongtravels.wordpress.com/2014/10/08/i-wont-go-unless-you-go-with-me/
http://listentothebabe.wordpress.com/
http://aprobertsstories.wordpress.com/2014/10/10/writing-101-anxiety-and-me/
I See Something
This years World Championship of Public Speaking was won by Dananjaya Hettiarachchi. In his award winning speech, Dananjaya tells the story of how people believing in him, changed his attitude to himself and as a result his life.
Have you ever had the joy of improving someone’s life by believing in them. The more they don’t believe in themselves, the more powerful someone else’s belief can be. Start by telling someone you can see potential in what they are doing or could do. It is this belief that can and will change lives.
If you are someone who needs direction to change your life, seek out people who believe in you and can guide your way. We can all improve our lives by seeing something in ourselves and setting the bar a little higher to reach that next goal.
Be inspired today to see something in everyone. Be that glimmer of hope that can turn into a bush fire of potential. Who knows were it will take you or them?
Share Your World – 2014 Week 40
You’re given $500,000 dollars tax free (any currency), what do you spend it on?
$500,000 would allow me to have a different lifestyle, which I would be grateful for. I would repay most into my mortgage, so I could work part-time. I would also pay it forward by giving the children a reasonable deposit for their own mortgage—payable only on a property purchase. I would make a donation to one or more charities or causes that make the world a better place. My special treat would be taking an extended 3-6 month round the world trip with my husband, ticking off many things from our bucket list.
What’s the finest education?
I believe self-confidence and self-belief to be the finest education a person can acquire. With these two life skills, you can achieve what you want in life and if necessary adapt your circumstances to meet your needs. Without these skills you can have a degree in any field and not be able to get a job despite your high marks. This is because your lack of self-confidence shows at interview, resulting in the more confident person with lower marks being chosen for the job.
What kind of art is your favourite? Why?
Pottery is both beautiful and practical and something I have always been drawn to. It cannot be made perfectly and pieces are really identical as they are individually made. My good dinner set was made by artist Helen Temasi over 30 years ago. I happened upon an odd piece of it by mistake in a small shop in Newcastle. Originally, she had made it for the Adelaide Art Gallery and to ensure she had enough quality pieces for an 8 piece dinner set, she needed to make an initial run of over 20 pieces—which in this case all worked. My dinner set is made up of the these pieces sourced from all over Australia.
Is there something that you memorized long ago and still remember?
I didn’t memorise things growing up. I am still not good at it today. When I am learning my speeches for Toastmasters, I learn concepts because I cannot remember exact words. This makes delivery difficult. sometimes, I write a great speech with everything in the exact order but some of the punch is lost by me not remembering the exact word at the exact time.
What are you grateful for from last week?
Last weekend I was awarded the One Lovely Blogger Award which I was grateful for. This helped my blog receive its highest ever views in one day, 167. Three weeks ago my best was 52, so I am growing and becoming more comfortable in this medium.
http://ceenphotography.com/2014/10/06/share-your-world-2014-week-40/